I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
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