Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
