Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
