Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Naked. naked and bneed help.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Randomize
