It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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