We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
