Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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