I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
