She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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