A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize