Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
40s are totally the cure
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
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