My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I faked an abortion last night.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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