Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
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