apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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