dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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