So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
We need a shit load of segways right now
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
