I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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