i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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