We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize