fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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