you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
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We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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