Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
