I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize
