my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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