Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Randomize
