So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
