Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Randomize