so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
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