she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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