My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
