I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Randomize
