I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Randomize
