He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize
