somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize