I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
