YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
