They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
In America we eat man semen.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
