he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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