Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go