clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
