we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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