Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize