Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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