So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
my poor anus
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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