So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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