i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
