he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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