my vag is so smooth its legendary
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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