Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize