grandma shit on top of the toilet
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize