dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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