"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
