dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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