I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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